Who Wants to Go Home Anyway!

Immigration Bill :: So Arizona now has a law that makes it a state crime to be in Arizona illegally. A lot of people are calling it racial profiling and is against everything this nation stands for. I have no problem with different races being in America; just wait in line like everybody else. Don't be lazy and do what's necessary to get legal. Obama is of course against it because now his lovely votes will be leaving this state. It doesn't matter anyway because I don't think a democrat will be winning in this state anytime soon... hopefully. In lieu of everything going on about race, here is a bit from Mitch Hedberg, a funny comedian...
You know when it comes to racism, people say: " I don't care if they're black, white, purple or green"... Ooh hold on now: Purple or Green? You gotta draw the line somewhere! To hell with purple people! - Unless they're suffocating - then help'em.

Rach had her first call from somebody inquiring about her cookies that wasn't a friend, she wanted them for a wedding... we'll have to see what happens.

I think I might have runners knee. I don't know for sure because I'm not a doctor. It hurts at the front of my knee when I do a lung. It was probably from kicking that door in to save a baby from the burning building... I wish I had fireman skillz!

Last Sat we took our kids to the pool for some swim lessons. It was the first time getting wet this summer for them. We thought it would be fun for the kids... Yeah RIGHT! This was our kids crying in the pool the whole time.

Well... I gotta give credit to Sean for sticking with it! He started to cry and wanted out after a little while, but he kept on going.



I watched the Suns game last night. It was a site to see! The Suns blew out Portland by 29 points! That's like the Suns played a whole quarter with Portland not scoring anything! It was blowing my mind! Watching the professional athletes run back and forth on the court got me all pumped to do some P90X!

Look out! You might get crushed by Rachael's cookie business! Eventful Cookies is getting more and more business! Snowballing to unprecedented heights! She got a call from church for a quote to see if she could do 325 cookies. I think Trinity is looking at the numbers... She also got a call for a baby shower. She may or may not get that gig too.

Lawnmower Man

Like a ninja hawk from the sky, searching, circling, watching... diving out of the sky and overtaking its prey! That was me vs the lawnmower yesterday. It took some talking into from Rach, but I took apart our free lawnmower (courtesy of our neighbor) and started cleaning it out to see if I could get it working. After watching a couple 'how to' videos my confidence level started to become awesome. A few screws later, I started to wonder if it was worth all the effort as I gradually got more high from all the gasoline fumes. After about 3 hours I finally got everything back together. I primed the beast with gas and started to tug like I’ve never tugged before! It started like a mighty v8! I roared like the dominant lion that I am to say that I have conquered the beast! It did however still have a problem. It doesn’t catch any grass/dust/dirt/particles/sticks/chopped up toys into the bag. Instead it was flying all over me and the lawnmower. Rach was watching me from the window and she couldn’t stop laughing at me as I was in the center of this huge dust cloud. I had to stop the lawnmower (risking not being able to start it again) because the dust was so bad! I don’t know why the grass and dust wasn’t staying in the bag; it just kept shooting out of the sides! Next weekend I'll figure it out I guess...

I had my soccer game last night. We won 6-0. I had an assist for a goal with my left foot cross to Scott who headered it in like a Shaolin soccer warrior! I didn’t know I was allowed to have two big victories in one day. It was a good day.

Rachael had a great idea to keep the kids out of her way in the kitchen while she’s cooking or doing the dishes. She put down blue tape in strategic locations and told the kids they couldn’t go any further, so simple yet so brilliant. Who’s got a smart cookie on his hands? I do.

Don’t sit on your surf board watching all the good waves go by, be brave and live life! - Joe Happ

Vomit Causing Earthquake

No wonder my parents were screwed up reading stuff like this while they were growing up!

I was watching the movie, Alvin and the Chipmunks with Sean. There was a part in the movie where the chipmunk’s rebel from Uncle Ian and take their clothes off... I looked back at Sean to make sure he wasn't stripping down. You just don't know what the little ones will copy now-a-days.

Man purposely vomits on Phillies fans
New Jersey man busted for vomiting on off-duty police captain and his daughter.
I read this news line thinking, is there no decency left in people!? My imagination totally rocks, so the images entering my brain disgusted me to the upmost bounds, so much so that it limited my ability to actually read the article. I linked it for you all if you wanted more details.

Since there have been so many earthquakes lately I thought I'd check out AZ. It looks like from USGS that AZ has most earthquakes near Yuma or Flagstaff. Which means Phoenix is due right? Maybe if all the hippies got together and made a circle around Phoenix mother earth would spare the city. I know, laaame…

Classroom Fun

I took the day off today to go to Sean's school and be a part of "Fudge" day! Friends, Uncles, Dads, Grandparents, etc... I really enjoyed it! Sean took the school bus early and I arrived at his school an hour later. When I got there Mrs. S was reading them a story about how awesome Dad's are. I gotta buy that book. She set up 3 other stations where Sean and I could hammer nails into wood and paint it, eat ice-cream with toppings, and squirt shaving cream on his hands and put it on Daddy's face. The shaving cream activity was the most entertaining. We all know Sean hates putting messy things in his hands, he needed some coaxing by Mrs. S but when the cream got into his hands he started to gag! I told him to put it on my cheeks so he quickly put it on and wanted to get the stuff off his hands. We cleaned him up and gave him a popsicle stick to take it off my face. He instead started spreading it around. While I was cleaning my face up Sean was very adamant that I get every bit, like it was acid that was going to eat my face away. Maybe he knows something I don't :) He had plenty of ice-cream and did really well with the hammer and nails. He wasn't really finished painting his wooden creation when the teacher wanted everybody to come back to the circle and sing some songs before leaving.

Rach and I just got back from taking the kids to the mall where they played like crazy in this weird play area outside. Sean insists on taking his shoes and socks off when there are signs that ask the kids to keep on their shoes because of hot or slippery surfaces. So that got annoying along with him running off into the store to follow Mommy. Rach left me with three, well, two kids because Sean wouldn't listen to me and ran off while she went to find Lacie a swimsuit for their swim lessons this Sat. So I was playing with Oz trying to keep track of how much time I hadn't seen Lacie because she was behind a big toy tree, so I thought that's where she was staying. I started looking for her after about a minute of not seeing her. I couldn't find her in the playground area. I immediately started to get sweaty and my heart jumped up 100 bpm! It was cool how my senses went into overdrive trying to listen, hear, smell anything I could at the time. I wonder if that's how super heros are except with way more efficient abilities. Anyway, I broadened my focus to the sidewalks lining the play area and found a store owner holding on to her waiting for a parent to come get her. I thanked her with much sincerity as I tried to calm myself down. I hate those moments! Probably like how a super hero feels when he loses his sidekick because the sidekick thinks HE can be a real super hero!

I bet Nash Doesn't Pull Weeds!

Like Father like son... I got tired of looking at the weeds in the cracks of our sidewalk that line our house. I've really liked spraying the weeds and just killing them instead of pulling them causing knee, back, and holy finger pain. Unfortunately, the weeds in the cracks were pretty big and I didn't want to compromise looking at brown dead weeds; so I found myself slowly creeping along the sidwalk pulling away! There were times I'd hear Dad in my head, "If your going to do the job do it right!" especially when I just couldn't reach deep enough to get to the root. Thanks for burning yourself into my head Dad!

Go Suns!!! Playoff time with home court advantage! This is our year to win it!

Lacie's got the sneakiness down. She loves to hide in her dresser cabinet and stay there. She knows we'll come looking for her. After she tricked us the last couple of times, we know where to come looking for her. No more booster seats for them! Yay! It was such a pain getting them in and out of the chairs. It's not as freeing as I had hoped, because now we are constantly telling them to get back in their chair with their food. It's not fun crunching a cracker into the carpet!

Yummmmiiieeeeee!

So I thought I'd treat myself today and have some Chipotle! Yummmieee (as Sean and Oz say). I tried to be healthy with it by putting it in a bowl and not getting sour cream. It was a good protein hit - 51g. I have my leg work out tonight. I hope I'm ready enough for soccer this Sunday, first time back in over a month.

I gotta say I'm impressed with what my wife can do with cookies!

Enter them into the state fair competition or something!
BTW! She makes many other cookie favors! http://www.eventfulcookies.com/

When we pray with Sean we have to be sitting on his bed with our hands folded. We'll say, thank you for, "Mommy and Daddy" he'll repeat and at the end say, "You and you" as he points to us. If we say Grandma or Grandpa or any other person not in the house, he'll say the word door. When we say thank you for Jesus, he'll also say, door too. I'm trying to teach him to say heaven on that one. 

Quick Pic

Saw this and had to laugh!

Hey kids! Be careful going under the chain as you climb the ladder.

Fat People Should Give Twice as Much Blood

I didn't get to see the kids at all yesterday! I finally got around to giving blood yesterday (technically plasma), I guess they had enough red blood cells but needed plasma. I don't understand why everybody doesn't just give whole blood and they extract what they need out of that! Actually I remember now... People can only give so much so by taking the specific red blood cells they can take twice as much while they "return" saline back into your system. So they basically took water and put water back in me. I hope it's at least purified... I’m helping at my church standing in this Sunday for a bells piece that requires an extra set of hands. I'm not that good, so I keep wondering why they call me to ask me for help. After all that I headed home, did my P90X, and watched Biggest Loser with Rach. I fell asleep hardcore during the biggest loser. Rach woke me up a few times, but I honestly can't remember the last half of the show. So I'll have to go back and watch it again.

Sean's enjoying going to school every day for a few hours. Rach has decided to knock it down to four days a week. His behavior starts to get a little too ornery from the other kids at school. He's been waking us up at around 6am now that the sun is coming up earlier. I ignore him in the morning so I can continue to sleep (Selfish me!) and poor Rach gets the brunt of his energy when he comes storming in. He’s doing really well pedaling on his bicycle. We all went to the park and he pedaled the whole way there while Lacie and Oz wore their sunglasses and relaxed in the wagon.

Why are fat people fat?
Genetics, gland issues, low self-worth, addictive behavior… whatever it is Obama’s going to solve it by making you read! That’s right! Work those eyes as you skim the nutrition info on the drive through menu of your favorite fast food restaurant. That way you can feel even guiltier about what you’re addicted to because of your family genetics! Glad you’re thinking about making America skinnier Obama, but fire the person who gave you that idea! You want to make fat people skinny and fix the economy at the same time? Start putting a tax on all the Twinkie crap food and soda drinks that’s putting everybody 6ft under from type 2 diabetes. Hey, kill two birds with one stone fixing our healthcare system too! The leading cause of death in the U.S. is heart disease. Because YOU’RE FAT! Just like cigarettes are taxed, tax the junk food!

13 Easter Apostles

Eaaaster Eaaster Bobeester Banana-nana Fo Feaster Me My Mo Measter EASTER! Why does the celebration have to stop?! Because I would faint from exhaustion with all those kids! We made it through the craziness that is kids on Saturday. We had something like 13 kids.

At one point they all got out of control and started some riot that required me to break out my riot shield and gas mask as they proceeded to reach into there diapers and flinging there holy poo! No, not really, but I don't think the real riot police could handle that!

I had a great time! Thanks to Rach for getting everybody to come and setting everything up! I was tasked with taking pictures, hiding eggs while the kids decorated the cookies, and cooking up the food. I've never cooked on my little grill for more than just me and the wife, so it was nice to have Chris and Billy there to help out. Oh btw, we were the only husbands there... Some of the best burgers I've ever had! Besides the big icing messes from decorating the cookies and the bubbles spilled on the patio everything went smoothly. I'm pretty sure Rach would agree.  Until next time... I must go now and pump the iron to get the rippage I desire!

Kid-Tested, Mother Approved

So let's understand something first. I'm working diligently at work as usual, and all of a sudden, like a holy dragon from the sky, my account gets locked out! I'm limited, working at 50%, unacceptable! This is no good so I call the support people in India to help me unlock my account. Stay with me here. In my line of work I have administrative rights to do many things: get into privileged work websites, different test domains, testing new OS image releases etc... So why am I calling some support person in India who's possibly been working for the company for less than 6 months to unlock/screw with my account?! Makes no sense!

Yes, we are still trying to get ready for the party tomorrow morning. Rach is at the store while Grandma Sher is at home with the kids... I'll refrain from saying anything, moving on... So like yesterday I'll be spending most of my day/night tonight trimming bushes and cleaning up with my blower. We bought a picnic bench to help with sitting while eating in the backyard, that plus it's totally cool, or super cute Rach would say. Let me see if I can dig up a pic...

Oh yes, here it is...

I haven't tried sitting on it yet, so for all we know it's kid-tested and mother approved! Sean's still in his pajamas in the pic. He loves his football footie "jj's".  I wonder what he'll do when he sees Oz wearing them a couple years from now? Hopefully his sharing abilities will have improved. Sean's been watching a lot Monsters vs Aliens lately. A good movie if you haven't seen it! Hail Gallaxar!

Easter Egg in the Bush

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh so what possesses people to put a bunch of maintenance requiring things in their front yard? People are lazy! It's all going to go to crap and look terrible until a $100 plus is shelled out to have Jesus -(pronunciation hayzues)- does it for you anyway! Yes! That's right! I am the lazy man and I want to pay Jesus, except my better half won't let me! I'm so not looking forward to going out and working on the yard as fast as I can before the sun goes down. I will be trimming lots and lots of bushes. You can call me, "The Bush Trimmer" if you like...

I must upkeep the bush and make it look pleasing to the eye.





Sean's a crazy little monster, now showing many more ways to defy us. I was sitting on the can/pot/crapper yesterday minding my own business and he shows me something that belonged to Rach. So I told him to put back. After telling him three or four more times he decided to spit at me. I couldn't believe it! I almost didn't know what to say. Luckily for him I kept my cool, because I'm a really cool guy, a bit gnarly at times, but mostly chilled.

We have a party this Sat morning that we are trying to prepare for. Rach has invited everybody and their mother, no, all families with kids. It’s supposed to be a crazy huge Easter egg hunt! We even bought a huge picnic bench for it. Reminds me of the bench I had on the patio growing up. I threw many a things off it to seal it's doom. Hopefully I'll be back to give you summary of the experience. Until then!

Why does the liquid come to the top of cottage cheese and sour cream? How can I have been eating these things for so long and not know why? This blows my mind!